6 Benefits of Crying If You Didn’t Win the Lottery Jackpot

You feel as if you’ve started playing the lottery a week ago. However, most likely you’ve been playing the lottery for years. And here you are, another week, another day and you’re still “Jackpotless”. Winning brings tears of joy, whereas losing brings a whole cloud on top of you. Depression is a symptom, but the most obvious indicator you didn’t win the jackpot are tears, but not of joy.

The optimist I am, and how want to view life from a different perspective, there are certain “benefits” of crying if you didn’t win the jackpot.

Tears Calming Ingredients – Second Wind “in your back”

This is as serious as I can be talking about benefits of crying because you didn’t win the jackpot. It’s a fact that tears can calm a person. That’s why people cry, that’s why animals cry. Once the tears reach one’s mouth, they bring this feeling of vigor, unexpected flow of strength, something like a second wind. Then again, this is not amusing right? I’m not an expert in biology, or anatomy. I’m just an average guy with passion for the lottery. My ultimate objective is to win the jackpot.

So, how can crying be beneficial for you despite not winning the jackpot? Obviously you’re not happy about that. You shouldn’t be!

If You Cry Your Friends and Family Will Go Easy on You

You can literally get away with being a “loser”. Bear in mind, you’re a loser only if you quit. Prove them they are wrong by crying like a little girl in front of them. They will for sure not bug you anymore, even if you hadn’t won the jackpot in the past 20 years since you first started playing the lottery.

If you’d won, you wouldn’t have to cry. Instead, they’d be the ones who cry. If they’re already nagging you about how you haven’t won the jackpot, just start crying like a little child. Their maternal/paternal instinct will compel them to comfort you.

Note, side effects include, but are not limited to being called a little girl, cry baby and my result in a sudden change in reputation and integrity. Use with caution!

Crying After Not Winning Means You Won’t Have to Settle a Big Tax Bill

Besides being beneficial, it’s also an indicator. Crying is old as humanity. However, “back in the days” there weren’t any taxes to settle, instead you’d have to run as fast as possible from that raging lion, raging buffalo or insert wild animal name here. Thanks to civilization, we pay taxes so no lions and buffalos and whatnot, can start chasing you all of a sudden.

Crying doesn’t only mean you didn’t win the jackpot, but it also means you will not have to pay millions in taxes. In case a representative of the authorities knocks on your door, open the door and start crying. The results are stunning. Sudden expression of shame on his/her face, getting away with it in the short term and you might even be called devious, smart, witty if you successfully avoid the tax agent longer than expected.

Did Something Got in Your Eye? – Don’t Worry, Your Privacy is Guaranteed

Is that allergy? Did something get in your eye? I don’t know what that is, but it certainly made you cry. But, why? Why those tears as if you have a role in a romantic soap opera? You are a drama king or drama queen?

Well, there’s a fine silver lining. Crying after not winning the lottery jackpot signifies you don’t have to bother about keeping your life private, because no one cares. If you had a several hundreds of million dollars in your bank account, people will throw at you.

Fortunately, you can start crying, let those tears of joy running down your cheek bones. Your privacy is guaranteed, at least for the foreseeable future. No news crew will surround your home; no media will have any interest in your life and no paparazzi to follow you around. You know how those new lottery winners whine all the time how their lives are ruined after they cash in the jackpot? You don’t have to worry about that.

It means you’re Not an Android with Artificial Intelligence

There’s a quote “Real sweat, real people”. However, I prefer the following “Running Tears, Running Fears”. Yes, I totally made that up, but it sounds catchy. Some people develop serious mental conditions that manifest with anxiety, weird behavior, anger, violence and a type of schizophrenic decisions.

Fortunately for you, you just shed a tear, and you can rest assured you’re a human being. A real human being with emotions! I know you’ve seen the Terminator. Try to remember if any of the Terminators cried at some point in the movie. The answer is no! Skynet is still not at hindsight, and you know you’re not a time traveler, a terminator sent to kill the real Sarah Connor.

Congratulations! – You’re not a Psychopath

Now, I’m not saying I have something against psychopaths, duh. But, certified psychopaths are prone to not show emotions, crying, being a kind of cover. As it turns out, psychopaths tend to wipe one tear at a time, meaning if you’re one, first you might wipe the left cheekbone, then the right. Watch closely, as you might be one notorious, secret psychopath.

A fun fact, psychopaths are among the most successful entrepreneurs, mathematicians, but I haven’t heard of any lottery winner that has manifested traits of one.

Now, do you feel like you need a good “session” of crying? When was the last time you cried? I recommend doing it whenever you feel comfortable.